We got to go for about 2 hours today. So little time and we both come out so changed. We went straight up to the children's ward where we were last time and met re-introduced ourselves with the nurses ("sisters"). They remembered us and quickly dismissed us to let us play with the kids. It was about 11a and many of the kids were asleep. There are four rooms of six beds we are able to go into (where the kids aren't contagious). The kids for the most part were asleep and their moms were SO tired. Each one seemed so drained. Since the kids were asleep, including the two we spent the most time with last week, we decided to go check out the other wards. This hospital is HUGE! Like, amazingly huge. So it took us about 10 minutes to find the maternity ward, then ask for permission and get redirected upstairs. All the babies up there were with their moms so we were told "not today". But I'd rather have those babies with their moms than needing people to hold them! But as you probably know- I LOVE babies and would have been so excited to hold some!! Especially bran new ones! :)
So Megan and I took the long walk back and headed to the children's ward. More kids were awake and we started talking with the moms and hearing what was wrong. Many of the mom's had only general guesses as to what was wrong- which was hard to see the defeat in their eyes as we would ask and they wouldn't really have an answer. We went into the room what had started to feel like home, where Olwe and the little boy were. Olwe slept for the next 30 minutes as we played with then fed the little boy. But this was the hardest part. Remembering Evie at 11 months, when we were walking her around as she was holding our fingers and as she was sitting up and crawling... this little boy couldn't sit up without us having a hand on his side. I changed his diaper and things were seriously wrong down there. We asked the nurse, who we were starting to get to know, Cynthia, and she said it was because his mother had neglected him he had so many problems. We had also noticed more.. once we picked him up it was almost a reminder to him of how it felt to be carried around and he DID NOT want to be put down. So Megan held him and I fed him. His eyes had a twitch and were a little cross eyed. He had two sores on his tiny left arm. He needed a bath so I used paper towels and wiped and dried him a little.. but not enough.I don't know if you have seen a baby with an IV in.. but it is just the saddest sight. Megan and I didn't cry because it wasn't the setting- but we were heartbroken. This baby is lucky to be fed, given an IV, looked after but still leaving him in such awful conditions was unbearable. This is his third time in the hospital and after the first time his Mom brought him in she just stopped coming back to care for him. The nurse Cynthia was equally as saddened by his condition. She has a 13 and 6 year old and could not believe a mother would stop caring for her child. And he is ELEVEN months old.. unimaginable. And to think that he still had one of the cutest and biggest smiles I've seen is amazing. Such a picture of pure love. Pure helplessness as any child has. The simple joy that comes with simple things such as a touch.
That's pretty much a Readers Digest version of the day. Olwe ended up waking up while we were feeding the little boy and a nurse fed and changed her then left. She just laid there crying. I almost couldn't take it. We were already late for getting our ride so I couldn't give her attention...
As I was writing this my roommate Amanda had on Jack Johnson and the song "If I Could" came on.
A brand new baby was born yesterday,
Just in time
Papa cried, baby cried
Said, your tears are like mine
I heard some words
from a friend on the phone,
didn't sound so good
The doctor gave him two weeks to live
I'd give him more if I could
You know that I would now
If only I could
You know that I would now
If only I could
Down the middle drops one more
grain of sand
They say that
new life makes losing life easier to understand
Words are kind
they help ease the mind
I miss my old friend
And though you gotta go
we'll keep a piece of your soul
One goes out
One comes in
You know that I would now
If only I could
You know that I would now
If only I could
Makes me cry... as it was so applicable to my experience today. "If only I could" be there every day to give that little boy and Olwe human touch and affection. So brokenhearted. Wondering what is MY role in this world.. in making these problems better. I HAVE to do something. And so do you. Children are being raised with 2 meals a day, random baths and don't know any basics in hygiene. Are we seriously going to sit around and just pray for them??? We are the hands and feet of Jesus. How will we move them? I no longer will have compassion for people who "don't know what to do" to help the situation. FIND OUT A WAY. Seriously, think of all the organizations out there. Sponsoring a child. Adopting a child. Sending money to hospitals or missionaries... I don't know what it is for you but I challenge you to not go unchanged.. not to click away from here to Facebook and resume life. Something needs to happen. I don't know how it looks for you and I'm not going to pretend I do... but I am looking at injustice, poverty, death and sickness and can not act like it's not happening. It is.
4 comments:
Baby! So sad!!! I'm heartbroken too. I can't imagine that this is normal for these kids. Please, God, show us what to do!
:'(
Don't have words...
I know exactly how you feel. It's so hard seeing that kind of thing. You are making a very positive difference in these children's lives- even if it doesn't feel like much. If you ever need to talk about it, I'm here! I am seeing what you are seeing and I understand what you are going through. Thank you for volunteering your time to leave AE and do that.
Thank you for sharing your fun and exciting times and your painful times. It is good for all of us to be reminded and be convicted of the pain in this world. We pray that God will use your eyes, your heart, and your words to make a difference in those little lives and the ones they represent. We love you Paige and lift you to God for strength.
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